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Profile
 Asian ; Filipina 18 years of fragility. This has been up since 2008. Rants of LOVE, life & whatnot. Affiliates
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I want a new one
Thursday, January 21, 2010
2:28 PM
1st day of exams, quite alright. :/What is there to rant about? A LOT. I really feel out of place. Something`s wrong, and it`s never been patched up. Do you realize, you`re blocking me out? You`re pushing me away. You`re leaving me behind. I`m like talking to one person haha! But really, it`s not only one. I think, uhh. XD I`m trying to like combine the convos but you[they] just.. Binastos lang nila ako. I even cried, good thing they didn`t noticed. One silly happening. Is when I was crying they thought that my boyfriend is the culprit and they punched him blahblahh. I felt guilty, because it`s not my boyfriend`s fault it`s THEIR fault. Confused. Haven`t you all realized how hard is this? After what you`ve said about me, I can`t gain my respect to myself. As much as I`ve tried going back in track with you guys but you just ignore, push whatever you`re doing right now to me. For example, even just with walking! For Pete`s sake. Conversation stuffs, secrets and the like. When you say a secret, I feel like a part is made up or a part is left out. And when were talking, it`s like I can`t relate with the topic. Like, you`re one year ahead and I`m one year left behind. I`m with you guys! Physically. But you don`t join me emotionally. I`m ignoring him just for your sake but I think you`re not acknowledging it. This is what you want, right? Less time with him, more time with you. Pero nileleft out niyo ko. It just hurts. I thought everything`s okay. Silence was my option. I don`t want to talk about it. I just wrote it, just so you know. Stop making me feel like a slut or a bad person. I hate every little thing you think of me. Sabi nga, ang nalamatan na friendship hindi na nababalik pa. MAKES FUCKIN SENSE. There will come a time and you'll just feel.. You just don`t belong with your friends, you might need a new one. Oh, college. You`re my only escape. |