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EdzRjs ♕ 120493
Asian ; Filipina
18 years of fragility.
This has been up since 2008.
Rants of LOVE, life & whatnot.


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» JONAH`S STORIES.


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COOL PERSON/S.

My life
Saturday, August 22, 2009 8:11 PM
What should you do if your parents are expecting a lot from you?
Siblings all screwed up, I`m the only one left.

I should repay their hard work but.. sometimes. I wish I don`t have to. The way they talk, cuss and say things to me when they`re mad. It`s just heartbreaking and gradually I feel I`m losing my respect for them. I didn`t intend to disobey them or disregard what they are saying.
DADHASABIGMOUTH. He talks full of bad words, a perfectionist freak. He doesn`t care what people would think if he is blabbing about my brother for being a black sheep in the family. The way he talks, it`s like everybody can`t do anything good. For Pete`s sake, he used to read the Bible everyday. But pertaining to his attitude, he`s the opposite.
MOMISANNOYING. She always ask questions to me when I`m not on the mood. But when I`m on the mood to tell stories, she doesn`t want to talk to me. She keeps hitting me like I`m still a child.

I want to succeed in life. I want them to be proud of me. But the way they treat me, makes me think again. Do I really want to? Or I just need to?
Sure, they buy me gadgets and stuffs. They support me financially, quite well enough. But in other aspects. I don`t know..

Lately, there had been a LOT of fightings all over the house. Since dad came home. I wish he would go to abroad again. I`m sick and tired of his one hell crap of a mouth. Rly. I won`t be like this, if he was good.

I`m tired of crying. I`m tired of being this person. I`m tired of being their daughter.
I`m tired being me. I`m tired of my life.

I want to move out of the house. I wish I could. But I have no place to go.

I shouldn`t give up. I wish I was stronger.
I wish I was born earlier.
I should be thankful for them. You couldn`t blame me. Be in my shoes, and you`ll see what it feels like.

It`s not easy being the youngest. It`s not easy when you know there`s only limited time for you.

I wish I was someone else.

Full of wishes. Anxiety.